


The Truth

by toowincesttolive



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angry Dean, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Past Amelia Richardson/Sam Winchester, Post Season 7, Suicide Attempt, Wincest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-17
Updated: 2015-07-17
Packaged: 2018-04-09 18:29:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4359698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toowincesttolive/pseuds/toowincesttolive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean was not in the mood to let this fight simmer anymore. He wanted the truth and he wanted his brother back. He wasn't expecting this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Truth

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little thing I wrote to deal for myself with the ridiculous events that occurred while Dean was in purgatory. It's been sitting in my Drive for months, so here you go. Set around the beginning of season 8, before Southern Comfort.

Dean knew their fight was inevitable. After Purgatory, he knew something was off about Sam from the moment he saw him again. Then, Dean found out about the dog and the girl. He thought he had handled it pretty well so far.  
  
That didn’t mean that he wasn’t upset with Sam. He chose a dog over Dean. A dog and a girl were more important than his own brother. Dean was ready to hit something. He was ready to hit Sam, but Sam would hit back, and Dean was not in the mood for an actual fight. Then again, Sam might not hit back, and that would probably be worse.   
  
He was sick of Sam tiptoeing around him, though. He was sick of the tension and trying to ignore what was going on between them. Honestly, he knew eventually he would get over purgatory and the dog. As of right now, he just wanted his brother back. So, Dean decided to start the fight and get it over with. One of them could storm off. The next day they’d both apologize. Then, hopefully, they’ll have some fantastic make up/I missed you sex that Dean had been counting on since he jumped out of that nasty, godforsaken place.

At least, that was the plan.  
  
“Alright, Sam. Let me hear it,” Dean sat down across from Sam at the table in their motel room.   
  
“Dean, I don’t want to do this right now,” Sam replied, but closed his laptop anyways.   
  
“Too bad. We’re gonna do it now,” Dean said.   
  
“Fine. Dean, would you like me to repeat the story to you?” Sam asked, nervous and slightly annoyed already.   
  
“No, no, Sam. I wouldn’t want to inconvenience you that way. Just tell me why the fact that you hit a dog was more important than giving a fuck about me?” Dean demanded. He stood up from the table. The stillness of the room did not miss him. He stalked across the hotel room away from Sam and then within inches of him. He repeated the process waiting for Sam to say something.   
  
Sam took a long time to form words. He opened his mouth twice and shut it, deciding on the right words. Dean’s pacing in the room made him nervous. He was pretty sure Dean knew that and was trying to get him worked up. He finally settled on a story to tell him, hoping it would be enough. “Dean, it’s not-“   
  
"Why do you defend her so much, Sam? You hit a dog, who gives a fuck?" Dean yelled, cutting Sam off with a burst of anger. He was dying for Sam to take a swing now. He was worked up physically, mentally, physically. He was ready for an absolute all out fight, and he was going to get one if it killed him.   
  
"BECAUSE I DIDN'T MEET HER BECAUSE OF THE FUCKING DOG DEAN!" Dean stopped in his tracks. He had planned to call Sam out on his lame ass excuse, not this. Sam stood up and yanked his sleeves back, showing off two long, terrifying scars on his wrists. They weren't recent, but they had obviously been deep.   
  
All of Dean’s anger melted away instantly. He could only stare for a few seconds, fumbling for words when everything clicked.   
  
"Oh my God, Sammy," Dean said. He instinctively reached for Sam's wrists to try to soothe away the scar. Tears welled up in his eyes.   
  
"God, Dean. Don't look at me like that." Sam pulled his arms back and pushed his sleeves back into place. He pushed one hand, hard, on Dean’s chest, making him stumble backwards. "It just makes it worse to see your pity." Sam spat the words at Dean’s feet.

  
"Sam. Sammy, no. Dammit, Sam, this was my fault," Dean said. He took a step back towards Sam just to try to hold him, or touch him, or do something.   
  
Sam took a step back as if they were in a synchronized dance with each other.   
  
"Nobody made me do it, Dean,” Sam mumbled. “Amelia just happened to be there to patch me up. I just... wanted you to know the truth." Sam turned and abruptly walked out of the room, not giving Dean any time to process and say something back.   
  
Dean stood there in complete shock for what felt like an eternity and a fraction of a second at the same time. When he came back to reality, Dean blinked and followed Sam out the door.   
  
The car was still in the parking lot, and Dean had the keys. Sam wouldn’t have had time to steal a car already. Dean looked around until he spotted a tall figure walking towards the bar nearby. Dean took off into a run after Sam, meeting him before the door to the bar.   
  
“Sam! Sammy, stop,” Dean tried to place a hand on Sam’s shoulder, but Sam shook it off. He passed the entrance to the bar, and Dean lunged and pushed him into the alley next to it.   
  
“What the hell, Dean?” Sam said, fumbling with Dean’s grasp when he felt himself pressed against the wall. Instinctively, he braced himself for a hit. He didn’t expect Dean to gently take his right hand and pull his sleeve back to reveal the scar.   
  
Dean rubbed his thumb over the raised pink flesh and brought it to his lips. Dean closed his eyes, almost preventing the one tear that slipped down his cheek.   
  
“Dean-“   
  
“Sammy, I’m so sorry. I left you completely alone. I'm sorry,” Dean whispered into the skin of Sam’s wrist. He reached for the other one, rubbing his thumb over it in the same way.   
  
“Dean, you don’t have to do this,” Sam whispered. A voice in his head told him Dean was just bullshitting his way out of this problem.   
  
“Yes, I do. Sam, you are my everything. If I’d come back and you were- I don’t know what I would ever do without you.” Dean’s voice broke. Sam looked up and saw the tears on his brother’s face, too.   
  
There were no words Sam could give to Dean, and Dean had too many words to choose the right ones for Sam. Dean compromised by pulling Sam into a tight hug. He wrapped his arms around Sam like he was trying to cover him completely. To protect him from everything bad out there in the world.

Sam’s quiet voice reached Dean in the hug. “I’m sorry I didn’t… do more. I just. I tried so hard, Dean. I thought you were gone.” Tears fell onto Dean's jacket, creating perfect little circles.

“No, Sammy. You did so good. So good. There was no way for you to even know where I was. I was the only one who could get me out. You know I’m a stubborn asshole sometimes. I’m sorry I was being so damn selfish,” Dean felt like he was in some kind of soap opera, or the end of some cheesy romance flick. He tightened his hold around Sam anyways. “I’m here now.”

“I know,” Sam mumbled against Dean’s neck. He rubbed his cheek against Dean’s jacket, taking in the smell of Dean. He could hardly describe it anymore. It had become a smell he was so used to he barely noticed it. Until he was gone, then Sam missed the smell everywhere. When Dean came back, he was so angry that Sam never got that relief he wanted. He took it in now with Dean’s forgiveness.

Dean pulled back first. Sam braced instinctively for another hit. Dean still held him against the wall. He locked eyes with Sam that bore deep into his being. Sam could see more than a glint of anger there. Dean shook him roughly once. “But, don’t you ever fucking do that again. Don’t you ever even-,” Dean inhaled a sharp yet shaky breath, “Just don’t.”

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to so-shrektacular.tumblr.com for putting up with my wincest shipping ass.  
> Please, Please, Please leave kudos, comment, subscribe if you liked it!!!


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